You said…
You can obey those who rule over you without placing membership in a “second” church. There is only one church…”

My reply…
Of course there is one church, but that one church is situated in various locations. The shepherds of those local gatherings are charged with the responsibility of shepherding only those who are part of their local gathering. To try to shepherd those outside their local gathering is unauthorized. Well, how can a shepherd know who is and isn’t a part of their local gathering if some indication isn’t given to them. Just saying they’ll be able to tell by their presence isn’t sufficient, for there are Christians who flit back and forth between local congregations, making both sets of shepherds expend time and energy trying to figure out if these people are theirs or someone elses.

You said…
Why can’t we be identified to a church by ones actions and not by ones words.

My reply…
Because it’s insufficient. How many actions does it take? Attending two potlucks, one door knocking, and a youth devo? You are aware, are you not, that there are many people who do many good works with a congregation, but who would say they are not identified with that local congregation? Why make this so hard on the elders? Why are you trying to make this something that they are going to have to catch all the clues left. Also in the process they can’t jump to a conclusion to hastily and assume they want to be identified when actually they don’t, and they can’t drag their feet and fail to shepherd those who wish to be identified with them. What’s wrong with just telling them? What’s the problem with that?

I recently graduated from the University of Alabama (last weekend), and this was a subject I struggled with. In my four years I attended 1 congregation for the first 2 years and 1 congregation for the second 2 years. The first two years I knew the college group well, but never really knew the whole congregation. The second two years I got to know the congregation very well. In all four years I attended the Tuscaloosa congregations much more often than my “home congregation.”

I never “placed membership,” but I often felt much more at home with the Tuscaloosa congregations. Any thoughts would be appreciated, I’ll be heading to medical school for the next four years and will have a similar situation!