Friday Night Lights, School Spirit, and Soft Porn

Comments 99

• Well said, brother!

• Well said, I agree totally , my girls were not allowed current fashions the skirts were short back then too, if they did buy them with their own money, (they all worked and earned their own money) while in school retail babysitting paper routes. If the item didn’t pass our inspection back it went, with many aw Mom’s and I bought it with my own money . If they appeared in any indecent skirt I would warn them of the consequences if hems were not adjusted and if they did not do that I ripped the hems out when it was laundry time. Maybe I was a bit ruthless but why are parents allowing this are they scared of their own children?
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• Much needed lesson taught to so many who are not seeing it this way. Thank you, Steve, for preaching the whole counsel of God. I appreciate you and your teachings for the betterment of God’s kingdom.

• Right on the mark , Steve. I have been disturbed by this as well. What disturbs me most is when a church member’s kid does this. I have not seen it with Karns youth but have with kids from other congregations. Sad………..

• Very well said!! You have put into words what my husband and I have thought so many times when we went to high school football games to watch our grandson play in the band. We couldn’t understand how or why parents would let their children out of the house looking as they did at the football game. Our world has changed so much since we were young and certainly not for the better. I worry about our 9 grandchildren and what they are facing in their futures. Why do we just sit by and accept all the sexual inuendos that are placed on our tv’s and on the large screens in movie theaters? Thank you very much for standing up!

• Why is nothing ever said about the football uniforms that the boys wear? There is nothing left to the imagination with those pants, and after the game they all take their jerseys off and walk around sweating and hugging everyone. Have you ever noticed how low those pants are at the waist in the front? again, not much left for the imagination. Yes, I have three girls, so this is a very touchy subject for me, because everything is always aimed at the girls. And how about the band flags, or majorettes and their costumes? Let’s discuss Baseball, basketball, track, wrestling, tennis uniforms, etc.

• For those who allow their daughters’ participation in these burlesque cheer performances, and who find no fault with it, i would ask them: “If you found your teenage daughter alone in a room with a strange middle-aged man, doing this exact same performance for him alone, would you feel comfortable with that?”

• Morality is gone from America. It is very sad. Keep praying, and make sure your own kids are raised right.

• God reclothed Adam & Eve after they left the garden , wonder if He would reclothe some of us?

  FHU has taken away cheer skirts and implemented cheer pants – I think nothing but good can come from a decision like that. (Not saying pants make you modest).

  Yeah – it may not be as comfortable.

• Steve you have placed your finger directly on a sore problem. Parents who allow their children boys, or girls, to dress and conduct themselves in such fashion directly contribute to the immorality which often is inevitable as a result. Many parents have simply given up and given in to the call of the world. Others simply seem not to even care what results in the lives of their children as long as it does not hinder the life styles of the parents. In it all we see the lack of love which is so necessary in the good training young people need and deserve. Thank you for a timely and critically important message.

• No apology needed! We must always “keep in mind/heart and count the cost for following Christ” for whatever the outcome may be after your comments above for His will be done…

• Steve, you hit the nail right on the head! I work in the public library system and am shocked at some of the titles and book covers of the young adult books that come across my desk. I think we have forgotten the word shame and what it means. It’s the word pride that is so prominent in our culture and the more popular the act the more proud our young are to participate-with the parents reliving their youth through their children. So proud of those who refuse to be a part and think they ought to be encouraged. They have to deal and see this everyday.

• I completely agree that Christian parents should not let their girls be immodest in dress or action. The problem is that many of those girls probably come from non-Christian homes (not that you can judge that by looking necessarily). We can’t expect families that don’t know Christ to follow Biblical principles. We need to be reaching out to *those* families with the message of the gospel, not a simply a message of modesty. And we have to redouble our efforts to teach our own children the truth over and over so they will be less tempted to go with the crowd.

• Well said Steve!!

• Jeremiah 6:15 – Are they ashamed of their detestable conduct? No, they have no shame at all;
  they do not even know how to blush.

  I grew up in a Christian family and my mom and dad raised 4 girls. That is one thing my parents did not allow was indecent behavior and dress like that. I went to a football game in high school with a friend of mine and we sat with some kids and they were drinking beer and passing it in front of me. I went straight home and told my mom what happened because my dad was an elder and I was worried about being seen sitting there and I told my mom I would never be put in a situation like that again. I by no means was a perfect kid, none are, but are there no boundaries for anything anymore? Where are the parents when these kinds of clothes are purchased? The parents are responsible and this kind of behavior does not begin overnight.

• Great article! In addition to the comments here, I’m bothered by the young people involved in swimming, gymnastics, and “dance”, wearing skimpy, revealing, and skin tight suits, as well as brides choosing to wear “strapless” gowns or “spaghetti” straps. (And I mean those who are Christians faithfully attending worship.) When a girl wears a strapless dress, a close up photo makes it appears that she is naked. God designed a “dress code” when He made clothing for Adam and Eve. The Hebrew word used by Moses means a garment covering the body from neck to knees. No bare shoulders, cleavage, belly, or thighs.

• I agree whole heartedly with what you have said. But it is not only at football games. “Christians” think nothing of getting married in strapless wedding dresses, going to the local pools in skimpy suits and clothing and going to Florida and wearing clothes or swim suits that in no way could be considered modest.
  Our youth group will wear knee pants to church activities and then go the public pools and wear bikinis. If this is not hypocritical, then pray tell what is.
  One preacher nearby said that in his grandmother’s day, it was considered wrong to swim in something that didn’t cover a woman from head to toe. Also women wearing pants was considered sinful. But now it is alright to do these things because the culture has changed.
  If the culture has changed, does that give Christians the right to do things that expose parts of their bodies which should be covered?
  I pray that the culture will change back to a time when Christians did not try to be so much like the world.

• no it doesn’t happen overnight, but we have a society of LAZY parents.do not want to take the time out of their busy day to make children mind.

• My sisters dropped out of the church because my mom didn’t approve of highsteppers. My mom did not want me to get involved in youth activities at church because of scantily clad girls in the youth group. I was taught NOT to wear shorts to church but doctor kids do and elders don’t say nothing for fear of losing contributions.I have personally seen MORE worldly girls at church in the church youth group — I have seen ALOT of skin at church!

• Thank You! This is the best presentation concerning this subject that I have ever read. I have often talked to Christians about the need to avoid this vary situation. It is sad that it is so excepted and justified by so many.

• Sounds like the school counselors should be involved in this. After all, it is the cheer teams and cheerleader supervisors who probably pick these outfits. Since “everyone else is doing it” the girls don’t think there is anything wrong with it, and most of them still have not experienced the repercussions of such acts. I imagine many of these girls attend church every Sunday and refer to themselves as Christians but in today’s world they see that “anything goes”. This was a wonderful letter, Steve, and I hope it gets in the hands of every parent, school leader, and other concerned citizen. I am one of those.

• Parents & kids do not realize how many perverts are out there watching them. Parents that are proud of there sons & daughters performing things that are sexually explicate & wear things that show more than it should, get upset when somebody will express a desire for that person & try to go further with what they see. Teach your children that the world will treat you the way they think you want to be treated by the way you dress & act. But kids will follow by example & will do what is expected of them. This is a sick a world. The world will do what you let it get away with. Remember you are being watched by your Heavenly Father & if we can not learn if examples that he has left for us to follow we are in trouble & lost. This is not only for the people of the world, but so called God’s people that think they they are so righteous. This is called being hypocritical. THINK

• I think you are absolutely correct —-i have seen the same thing at our high school and JV games and it makes me think wow do these parents even care?? I even saw a pregnant high schooler with a sports bra on and her belly painted ! I have told all of my children God does not approve of that and if i would ever catch them doing something like that they would sure be embarrassed when i drug them out of that game infront of everyone !! It very much makes me sick for my little boy to ask mommy why are her breasts showing or why don’t those boyys have a shirt on….yep it makes an impression ! You are only stepping on the toes of the parents that let there kids act this way, and u know what so be it!!

• Very well said…not only is this happening in stands at a football game but also creeping into the church building….There should be more preaching against how people should dress not only for the young people but adults too. The world is creeping in on us and we’re sitting back and letting it because we are afraid of offending someone. Ladies it’s a sin to cause a man/boy to lust after your body and its a sin for you to cause them to lust after your body because of the way you are dressed….so put your strapless dresses and tops and those short/tight dresses/clothes in the garbage can and cover up your bodies…and men/boys shorts and tank tops are not appropriate dress either.

• Amen!!!!!

• Good job as always; well thought out, well written & timely.
  As I see it…The problem- Parents. The reason- 1 John 2:15-17. The solution- Luke 9:23; Rom.12:1,2.
  Additionally there is a very dangerous side issue and that is the taking of videos & pictures. No question it is occurring and will sooner or later end up on the World Wide Web. You can also rest assured that the sites they will end up on are ones that do NOT promote modestly & purity. I wonder why? Is this not a clear indication of how the world views such clothing & conduct?

• I agree with you. So sad parents let their children participate in these activities and they think its okay. But also what about people like us who go to these activities with our younger children? They see all of this and think its okay. I know we have to teach them what’s right and what’s wrong but one thing we should do is not expose them to any of it if at all possible. Young minds are very impressionable. Just like if they live with someone who cusses they think its okay to cuss. Also we as parents need to say something to the school or the school board. If I understand correctly a football game would be a school function and aren’t the dress codes suppose to be enforced then also?

• I have had the same concern as Becky. Recently, a minister asked what sermons everyone would like to hear. This is some of what I wrote to him- “I would like to hear someone speak on whether it is scriptural, given what we are told about modest dressing, to watch, support, and/or participate in sports in which skimpy, tight, low-cut, high-cut, thin fabric apparel is worn. Many of these uniforms leave little, if nothing, to the imagination.This would involve many sports- cheer-leading, football, gymnastics, figure/ice skating, and others. Do we idolize sports so much that we find them too difficult to give up? Do we look forward to watching or “rooting” for our favorite team or individual sports figure more than we do praising and worshiping God and carrying out his commands? Do we not dress immodestly ourselves nor allow our children to do so but then turn around and sit down to watch a show/game that features athletes dressed immodestly? Is this subject never or rarely discussed since too many “toes would be stepped on” (mine included)? As Christians, are we sending mixed messages to our children and others around us? A couple of weeks ago, I thought that I would try to “like” football since every year I see so much excitement and enthusiasm about it. I sat down and started watching. After a while, I basically found that for me personally it was somewhat exciting to watch. However, I could not help but be very much aware of the tight pants worn by the players; pants so tight that nothing was left to the imagination and so tight that attention was brought to areas where it should not have been. I know that even in public schools that nothing can be worn that brings attention to certain areas. Are we to just overlook this in any sport?

• Excellent commentary. Public school is no place for children.

• THANK YOU!!!! YOU ARE SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO RIGHT!!!!! BREAKS MY HEART!!!!

• I totally agree. And, as someone mentioned above the boys aren’t any better. I was a teenager once… I wasn’t a christian at the time. Do you think the girls go to football games because of their love of the sport? Most of the time it was to see the boys in their tight uniforms. Immodest cheer outfits aren’t the only culprit for girls. Some volley ball or soft ball outfits leave little to the imagination. Some volleyball “shorts” are nothing more than underwear, and there are christian parents who allow their daughters to participate.

• Absolutely, I serve on a college athletic board and we complained about the dance spirit troupe doing obscene gyrations and the cheerleader coach cried and told us how proud she was of their activities. We complained about an overweight cheerleader having a uniform that was obscene and they said we couldn’t go there because it was discriminating. Our AD yelled at us and almost called us morons, but things did change. So call the school, tell them in a nice way and then tell them again. Schools belong to us, it’s time to take them back.

• Excellent observation. So what do you plan to do? Will you boycott football games, pull your kids from school to avoid exposure to this filth? I never attended dances or football games in high school and had no desire to so it would be an easy choice for me to make.

• Well said!

• I am a Christian and my husband and I are raising four daughters. My oldest daughter is a senior in high school and on the high school dance team. Her dance team is known for being the best in Central Texas if not the whole state. I have a problem with this article. Not only is her dance uniform pretty modest but their half time performances are not “soft porn.” My daughter also has an extremely high moral system and character. She has never even had a boyfriend. In the four years she has been involved with her dance team I do not know of one girl on the team that has become pregnant. There are however girls at her school that are pregnant and some even have toddlers. The dance team director has a no nonsense policy when it comes to partying, drinking, and even public displays of affection. The girls are not allowed to engage in those activities. Nor do they really have time. My daughter is in practice every morning at 7am. She is in all AP classes, is taking classes at Austin Community College as well and holds down a job. I am tired of seeing articles like this that portray the dance team girls as being sluts. I don’t know what dance team the author witnessed but maybe he should ask the parents of these girls what they are really like instead of making haste judgments about them and their parents. God also said do not judge others. One other point- my daughter’s dance team (in a public school) has a team chaplain. They pray before every performance and every day during team circle. They even have a dance in their annual spring show dedicated to God. Do not judge another’s Christianity before you even know them.

• I agree ENTIRELY, even though I wish you had quoted parts of 2 Tim 2:22 more precisely. “So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart.” Two things I notice. There are youthful lusts, things that parents either have not experienced, or have grown callus to where they don’t consider the harmful effects of what their children now crave. Secondly, it is IMPOSSIBLE to pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace from a pure heart while participating in youthful lusts. These two pursuits are headed in opposite directions! If you run toward one you will always be running from the other.

• Steve, thanks for the article. You are right on target.. I am afraid the WORLD is becoming the home of many Christians today. Popularity is becoming more important than faithfulness.

• Although I agree 100% with your article, I would not be at that game or would my child. There are just some things you have to give up and instead look forward to a pure version in eternity. Prov 4:15

• Hello Lisa,
  I appreciate you taking the time to speak out on this issue. However, it seems we disagree. You stated that your daughter is on the school dance team and you defend that decision in your post. Well all I can say is that either your daughter’s dance team is different than every other high school dance team I have ever seen, or our definitions of modesty, shamefacedness, and decency are different.

  You also stated that your daughter’s dance team’s uniforms are “pretty modest.” Pretty modest? To me, that sounds like you aren’t very convinced yourself.

  Also, the fact that a group of people, any group, don’t get pregnant is not proof of moral purity. I’m happy to know that no single girl is pregnant, but that’s not at all a sufficient standard for morality.

  Furthermore, I find it interesting that you would quote the Bible to me, telling me not to judge. Yet, you seemed free to express yourself in stating that I am wrong. Could I not say the same thing to you? You see, actually the Bible does condemn judging (Mt. 7:1ff) but the judgment that he’s talking about in that context is a hypocritical judgment. However, In John 7:234, Jesus actually commands us to judge people, but it is to be a righteous judgment. When I make judgments about a person’s behavior and teaching based on what the Bible teaches, that action is permissible.

  You suggested that I ask the parents of the girls on the dance team what they’re really like before I make a judgment. Really? You mean I can’t make a judgment based on their own behavior and dress? Would you apply that same standard to other situations? If you saw a young person commit an immoral act whatever it may be (shoplift, curse, bully, etc.) are you saying you couldn’t legitimately draw a conclusion about them until you talked to their parents? I don’t believe you actually believe that.

  I am a Christian and my husband and I are raising four daughters. My oldest daughter is a senior in high school and on the high school dance team. Her dance team is known for being the best in Central Texas if not the whole state. I have a problem with this article. Not only is her dance uniform pretty modest but their half time performances are not “soft porn.” My daughter also has an extremely high moral system and character. She has never even had a boyfriend. In the four years she has been involved with her dance team I do not know of one girl on the team that has become pregnant. There are however girls at her school that are pregnant and some even have toddlers. The dance team director has a no nonsense policy when it comes to partying, drinking, and even public displays of affection. The girls are not allowed to engage in those activities. Nor do they really have time. My daughter is in practice every morning at 7am. She is in all AP classes, is taking classes at Austin Community College as well and holds down a job. I am tired of seeing articles like this that portray the dance team girls as being sluts. I don’t know what dance team the author witnessed but maybe he should ask the parents of these girls what they are really like instead of making haste judgments about them and their parents. God also said do not judge others.

  One other matter, surely you’re not suggesting that because they have someone to say a prayer and actually dedicate what they’re doing to God makes it acceptable are you? I don’t have to think very long or hard to come up with Biblical and modern examples of atrocities that are committed in the name of religion. Whether someone prays or doesn’t, whether it’s dedicated to God or it isn’t is not the issue. The issue is whether it is pure or licentious.

  Again, I appreciate you taking the time to comment, and I would also appreciate it if you would weigh my response.

• Very good, and I agree completely brother. Thanks for your work!

• Well put Steve. It is not easy to be pure in a world of impurity. We will not get to heaven by accident or by our confidence in ourselves. It is not enough for us to think we are doing right, we have to do right in God’s eyes. Let us be holy as He is holy.

• Years ago, we lived in a very Southern state, and enjoyed going to the local college football games. The College had a group of young women who performed during the game and at halftime. They dressed in tight, very immodest looking clothing of a one piece, mini-skirt type outfit with knee high boots, and enough makeup to cause Max Factor’s stock to hit the roof! They went out and did a routine similar to the Rockettes – leg kicks, et all. Yet, as we were passing by these young women before the game, they were all gathered in a circle, and they were praying and thanking Jesus for all that He has done. They never got the Hypocrisy! There they were, in outfits that should have made them blush, and they were praying to Jesus … Many people are willing to accept as a standard of being right or good, what others do without questioning if it is really good. I would not have been comfortable letting my daughter wear anything like that, yet these young ladies felt that they were somehow honoring the Lord by their actions … Your article is right on. And yes, we must be teaching both our young men and women about modesty. Young women are an easy target, but young men as often just as guilty.

• Very well said. I have two sons. As they grew up, I was grateful I didn’t have daughters because of this very thing. I kept an eye on what they wore and I talked to them about how they should act, dress and how they should treat girls. Thankfully they listened because they are now 23 & 20 and good Christian young men. I pray that they raise their children the same.

• I’ve heard this once before, and I agree. People try so hard not to offend others that they won’t call things what they are anymore. I would’ve never felt comfortable wearing those outfits, and I find it hard to believe that any other Christians could, either. Ladies need to realize that, perhaps in a zealousness to be more like equals to the guys and take hold of our own sexuality, that perhaps we’ve lost something in the process, something worth fighting for. Men are visual. Duh, you might say, but think about it. When you’re showing all that skin to him, are you challenging him to look deeper than your exterior and to find out who you REALLY are? Name the last time that a guy saw a girl in a low-cut blouse and said, “Wow. I bet she has a great personality.”

• The topic at our next Ladies Night is “Modesty.” Would it be alright to use your article?

• Thank you for standing for truth. The Bible teaches it! Have heard members of the Lord’s church TRYING to defend “strapless” and mini. It is nauseating to me so what DOES God think? You answered the question very well. “There’s a Great Day Coming, When the saints and the sinners shall be parted right and left”, and that football game is not where Jesus would want me to be. I haven’t been, and I won’t be going. “I Want to be Ready, to meet Him by and by. I want to be more like Him, And do His blest command, i want to be ready to meet Him, In the gloryland”. Lord, come quickly.

• I accidentally hit wrong button and I DO want to read the comments to be further uplifted. Thank you.

• Great artical and the comments are right on as well. We need more of these lessons beginning, at home, and from the pulpit. As it has been eluded to it seems that the ministers are afraid of stepping on toes. Mine has been stepped on before and I survived and I am sure that others will too. A well stated and needed lesson. Thank you for being big enough to stand up for God.

• All that you mention isn’t the problem, it’s the symptom. The problem is with the heart and no amount of forbidding, lecturing, shaming or rule making will change the heart. If it did, we would still be under law. We need to teach our children, and perhaps learn for ourselves, what it means to truly love God. Until we do, we will not see an improvement.

• I totally agree. As a previous drill team and cheer team coach I had to fight thru the choreography to keep it clean. My girls didn’t understand, but I put a firm foot down and kept the dancing to a rated “G” level. They would continue to try, but I would just tell them that I would absolutely not send them out in front of people to perform something that would make me blush. (I’m very modest so making me blush wasn’t very hard.) God put me in charge of leading these girls for part of their teenage life. I’m hoping that some of my actions are speaking louder than words in their lives.

• The comment made by Charles Mclean impressed me the most. That alone should be the deciding factor for parents, even ones who do not follow God’s teaching on the subject of immorality, yet love their children.

• I agree whole heartedly with your article, I don’t know who you are or where you come from. As stated I appreciated the article, it is what I was taught from my childhood, and is what I stand for. The problem, as I see it (been wrong before), is in the heart of the parents in wanting their children to be as close to the world as possible. They do not raise their children in the spirit of (Tit.2:13-15; 1 Pet.2:8,9) because in their heart they are not and so do not raise their children to be a peculiar people, raised for the Royal Priesthood. Everyone of God’s children will answer the same questions of old from the Garden: Where are you?, Who you listening to?, Have you sinned?, Do you understand what thou hast done? Sadly I have found as a general rule, elders, thus preachers, plainly will not allow anyone to be offended with sound teaching regarding any aspect of the truth, reason being the offended party may leave. Their first desire is peace, don’t make any waves, in their desire for peace they but help strength the storm about to hit their house built upon the sand. The main problem I have found sadly with the elderships I’ve been involved with, is the people having selected said elderships, are themselves unqualified; placing the office over qualification (but that is for another day). I don’t want anyone to leave either, but to physically leave a congregation is just the outward manifestation of the heart. In reality they had left long ago, they simply had no courage to do so on their own. They like Herod (Matt. 14:1-12) are seeking the opportune time to behead (kill the messenger) and blame another. This battle over modesty will never be won on the outside it can only be defeated from within the hearts of people, (Matt.15:18-20). Sorry for being long winded and the poor punctuation.

• I have to wholeheartedly agree with the article. That is the number one reason I don’t go to sporting events anymore. I am a parent and a foster parent. I never allowed my daughters to be cheerleaders, or on the dance team, or the flag team or whatever else the school was pushing. We have received alot of flack from a 15 year old girl we had in our home because of not being allowed to participate in the “popular” activities. I also asked one of the high school girls once, who she was trying to prove she was a female to. She was wearing clothing tight enough to be a second skin. This was her normal apparel. She never answered, just smiled. So did she know what she was doing? But yet, she professed to be a Christian. Are males exempt from this? In no way, shape, or form are they exempt. They have just as much responsibility to be modest as the girls. Modesty starts with the parents, though. If a parent is going to allow their child to dress or act in this provacitive manner, then they should not be surprised or indignate when they discover their sons or daughters are sexually active, much less pregnate.

• Sir, I too nearly faint at what the girls wear to school. I know that are not sneaking clothes out and changing later because I have seen these girls with their mothers in Starbucks before school. Guess what, the mother’s look the same. Guess what, they go to church too. Guess what, the stores are full of these short shorts here in Arizona because of the weather here. My point is that it all starts at home. Kids will push the envelope and explore the limits, as all teenagers do. They go through phases and grow out of it and mature.

  If you do not want your kids or yourself exposed to this you have choices. Home school or private school with a dress code. I can say my parents chose to send me to a Christian High School and I “learned” just as much there from a preacher’s son as I would have in a public school. Not to mention by being so sheltered I was in a culture shock my first year of college and didn’t know how to deal with “those other sinful people” in the real world. My point is, the world happens, trends happen, and not everyone will EVER share your values. All you can do is keep your values close to you and allow your children to figure it out. There is a balance and it is all a matter of choice. You do not have to socialize with these other people, so don’t worry about it. If your values are strong, then it shouldn’t affect you so passionately.

• The article does not go quite far enough. Christians must learn to avoid situations where those things occur. Does going to events where these things occur meet the requirement of Matthew 5:13-16, 28, and 1 John 2 :15-17.

• This brought to mind something that was said to me over 40 years ago. The principal of El Sausal Jr. High in Salinas, Ca. where my daughter was in the eighth grade said, “The worst thing that ever happened to this school is when they changed the dress code and starting letting the girls were pants to school.” He went on to say that it seemed like an overnight change in the girls in that they became more aggressive, less lady like and started getting into more trouble at school and school functions. They’ve come a long way since the 1970s.

• I’ll never forget the Thursday night service when the evangelist stepped from behind the pulpit, and asked the elders for “Permission to speak freely?” I guess when he saw a few headshakes in the affirmative, he continued, “Permission granted–Thank you…….. GIRLS!!! Don’e be surprised when some young man expects you to ACT like a prostitute, after you’ve dressed like one!!!” Then he proceeded with the rest of the sermon.

  Preach it! Preach it!! Preach it!!! It is no surprise after so long of the ‘church’ being soft on the “not-so-bad” sins, that people now expect us to be soft on the “REALLY-bad” sins.

• I totally agree with this article! Thank you! Another thing that my family has experienced when we went to a college women’s soccer game, audio porn. I could not believe the music they were blaring during halftime, much of it was rap but it definitely was rather sexually explicit. Even more saddening was some little girls around 3 years of age actually singing and dancing along with the song and their parents looking on as if it were cute that there little ones knew the words. I have heard this music playing in the schools. So sad to me. No praying in school but they often play this same type of audio porn during lunchtime at the school. Totally disgusting and sad to me.Three of my children begged by the time they got to 8th grade to be home-schooled and this, among others, was one of their complaints.
  Thank you for the article. It is good that someone takes the time to write and take a stand against what has become the ‘norm’.

• I want to reply but I am at a loss for words. (and that rarely happens to me). I agree with all you said. And I even see signs of the same thing “in church”, which absolutely floors me. With that said, I am sad to say that I don’t think there is any stopping this cycle. Remember when Gone with the Wind had the first bad word in film? See how far we have come? We have become a modern day Sodom and Gomorrah and I’m not sure how to turn that around. We can’t even stop what is happening in our government which has me scared to death. America as we have known it is no more. Oh that there would be more Colt McCoys, Jordan Shipleys and Duck Dynasty Robertson men in the world who will stand up for the word and proclaim Christianity with no fear of retaliation. I pray that the world will wake up and put the Lord back at the head of the table. Phil Robertson for President!!! And Jesus Christ as our King!!

• I know I run the risk of angering many of you who have already expressed your agreement with the author but I feel lead to step in. I am a college senior who grew up in the church and am an active member of my local church now. I also was a member of our high school dance team and danced competitively for a studio for a number of years. I don’t know where the author was when he saw this performance but all of our dances were tastefully choreographed and our uniforms-while above the knee to allow for our stunts and fitted to show the actual movement-were all modest.
  What I find most concerning are statements that we must remove ourselves from events like football games and school dances because we Christians when, as Christians, we are specifically called to go to these places and be a light unto the world. Jesus himself did not spend al of his time in the synagogues but with the sinners. We are told to “go and make disciples”. Not spend our days in the comfort of our church potlucks and community groups but to go into the world and spread the love and forgiveness that we have received to others, through loving and being a blessing to those around us.
  I also grow alarmed at what I worry are harsh legalistic ideals here. It is not our job to police parenting styles, or to scream at young girls from the pulpit that they are dressing like prostitutes. That is the job of the Holy Spirit. True, we provide wisdom and guidance from a place of brotherly love but the judgement should be reserved for the Lord. There is a reason so many of my classmates have left the church-the church has became a place of rules and shame instead of a place of forgiveness and love.
  I encourage each of you, to instead of judging my generation as a whole to get to know us. To invest in us and lead us, through love, closer to the cross. We are not a lost generation-I have faith that the same shepherd who went after the lost sheep will come after each of us and lead us back to Him.

• What it takes to change our nation is people willing to follow the teachings of God every day. Repent of our sins so we can teach others……..

• I’ve been so discouraged lately when I drop my son at the high school doors and see the girls walking in around him. It is so hard for a boy to focus on his school work when girls are exposing themselves all day. There is a dress code but it is not enforced. Our family stopped going to school talent shows years ago and avoid some other events because we feel like we are dirty when we leave. Parents should be ashamed of themselves. They are helping pedophiles to get their thrills easily.

• Too many times we really do not think about what God would think about this. We let our kids join, because everyone else’s kids have joined, and it’s the accepted norm. Bump and grind, half dressed, sexually explicit. We think it’s ok… think about what we are doing to our kids???
  This is so gross. Letting our young daughers bump and grind in front of strangers, many who are men with perverted minds! It’s just not safe…
  parents… THINK…

• A hearty amen! to the article. Thanks for writing it and sharing it. We should ALL take it and share it. So many good thoughts already presented that it would be hard to add anything else. We know what we need to do,,,,walk our talk….so let’s do it. Stand firm. Teach. Pray.

• I completely share your sentiments. The performances by “dance teams” make me sick. The outfits are bad enough, let alone the types of music and movements they exhibit. More parents and concerned citizens need to address this with school administrators.

• We homeschool, but see this kind of stuff every time we go to Wal-Mart– even at homeschool meetings and church sometimes. I have spoken out about this at a homeschool meeting, and several of the other moms verbally attacked me, saying that their daughters were in the local dance/cheer classes, and the outfits and dance routines were “very modest compared to other ones”. Then these mothers went on to say that the kids wear a “cover-up” over their outfit until time for the routine, then remove the cover-up, perform their stuff, then put the cover-up back on. Also, the moms told me that the dance routines have to be on the “cutting edge” to keep up with the competition. Are they not listening to themselves?!? The fact that the girls are having to cover-up what they’re not wearing tells me a lot! And I’ve seen some of the cheer/dance routines these kids do. They are embarassing–but the parents are out there hollaring, clapping, and cheering their kid on. We’ve just chosen not to participate, and my kids are okay with that.

• It is true, we have become a nation where we look the other way often when it comes to private behavior out on the ball field. I saw part of my first half time show this past year and I was embarrassed to have to see that. However, I think we need to be careful as well with how we talk. I have seen many parents tell their children, especially boys “Oh, my goodness…they are dressed so immodestly.” Rant and rave about it. I think we need to remember that it is our job to teach our boys to have guards set before their eyes, self control and behave in a godly manner, no matter how a girl is dressed. Similarly, girls also struggle with this, often they are pounded and pounded on about covering up, dress modestly and sometimes it can cause huge issues with them as well. Dressed modest or not, make sure we don’t blame the evil of society on women. The large part of the blame is on the people that use that as an excuse for evil. I see many of these comments talking about the young women, but no comments about the temptations the young boys are bringing to all the young women out there. As a mother of boys, when are we going to learn to protect our sons, by teaching them that while immodesty is rampant….we have a responsibility before God to stay pure in our hearts and minds. It might mean looking for ways to reach out to some of those young people that put themselves on display. It might not mean telling them off for how they dress, but inviting them over for dinner and building a relationship with them, and by example, they may learn to change their dress.

• I remember going to high school pep rallys and games back in the mid 80’s and being embarrassed as a young girl watching the Dril Team roll on the ground and hip thrust. Also I thought it inappropriate that our band always played and marched to the song “My Angel Is a Centerfold” – look up the lyrics! I wish I had been proactive and talked to my principal about how offensive to women I found that song. So parents must stand up for their kids.

• We may protect ourselves and our children, but understand that we must show them that it ALL originates in the “intents of the heart.” We should all know and search out our convictions and how they fulfill the standards outlined in the Bible. Looking to those Biblical standards does not make us “old fashioned” or “outdated/irrelevant.” We must teach our children to search themselves along with teaching on why I as a parent feel that some things are unacceptable. I realize that my teens may push the limits, but somewhere in their mind and heart the teaching remains…maybe someday they will return to what is right. I appreciate a blog with the open truth, especially coming from a gentleman.

  Oh, and one more thing, to a post above….strong values can’t make one less passionate. Passion is what drives our “wanting to be right” on God’s terms. It is the only way real Christians survive. It is what drives our repentance.

• Of course our sons are tempted. But start reading proverbs and you will see a man giving advice to his son. How to save himself… Young men have to be very strong against these temptations. Most aren’t as we see.
  Look at the number of women who haven’t a clue as to who is “baby daddy”….
  Raise your child right, and he will come back to it.

• AAAAAAAAAAAAMEN, as a high school chaplain and student minister I see this continually. We, the church, allow our kids to participate in this type of activity and root them on, and then expect a different result than teen pregnancies, abortions, alcohol, and drug abuse. Jesus was clear that you shall know a tree by its fruit, so parents, when others tell you the apple doesnt fall far from the tree, ask yourself what kind of fruit is falling from your tree.

• all I can say to this article is…AMEN!

• I agree with your article.

• I am older than you and Abbie… Have kids your age… Bob & I speak often of the decline we have observed through the years. There is no shame in society anymore .. Anything goes …. People have forgotten how to blush…. We weep and wail over a couple of hundred youngsters gassed w/ chemicals, but turn our collective faces from MILLIONS of pre born babies scalded by saline or dismembered in utero. Life is cheap… Morals are non existent re: open pornography and murder. The same root cause is at fault here . These kids are ” protected” from knowing they are part of God’s Creation….and not “evolved” frm monkeys . It takes a mighty strong loving Christian home to counter prevailing secular lies. As hard as it is we must continue to be salt and light in this dark world.. Aware that our Light shines ever brighter the darker it gets around us.

• amen to this

• I totally agree!

• Thanks for a great article Steve….umm…just wondering…but maybe you should stop going to the game? Because all of what you said is true…is that where you want to be when Christ returns?

• Great article. You keyed in on something that I have noticed several times, ‘innocence of a little child” … [edited here by S.H.]… It has saddened me when I see parents effectively training that modesty out of their children by encouraging them to dress like the rest of the world.

  To you new parents out there, please notice this natural modesty and nurture that, trust me society will push the immodesty on them all to quickly.

• Preach the Truth, it takes courage..but please keep preaching it! All true and its all over the country, in our city and at our games!

• 2 Timothy 3: 1-7 This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come. For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God; Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away. For of this sort are they which creep into houses, and lead captive silly women laden with sins, led away with divers lusts, Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.

• Amen and Amen!

• Perhaps your son could join a community or church orchestra and you all could avoid the games altogether. Totally agree with your article. So absolutely sad.

• How sad it is that people who long for acceptance and attention can only find it in “negative” ways. Perhaps instead of shaking our heads we need to show the undying love of Jesus to those who are crying out to feel accepted.

• Thank you for sharing these truths.

• Hello Addison,
  I appreciate you taking the time to respond to my article. I don’t agree with all you say, but I appreciate you taking the time to express your point of view. I’d also ask you to consider my response to you comments.

  First, you talked about being an a dance team and being dressed modestly and unprovocatively. All I can do is take your word for it, but I will say this. If what you say is true, it would be the only dance team I’ve ever seen that was the way you described it.

  Second, you found the statements disturbing that called for Christians to withdraw from society. For clarification’s sake, I never advanced such a position. These were comments that others made. I happen to agree with you to the extent that Christians cannot disengage culture. We need to be a light to the world.

  Third, you spoke of worrying about harsh legalistic ideals. I offered none of these in my article. Nor did I attempt to “police parenting styles.” Furthermore, I don’t, nor did I suggest that we “scream” at young girls from the pulpit. Don’t you think such perjorative language is a bit over the top? As for it being the job of the Holy Spirit to “scream at young girls,” well, I don’t think you’ll find him doing that either. The Spirit of God does indeed convict sinners. But this same Spirit has instructed his followers to share his word with others. So whether one is convicted of sin by reading the Bible, or by listening to a Christian sharing the Bible, the result is the same. The Spirit of God is instructing.

  Fourth, you said judgment should be reserved for the Lord. What do you mean by that? Eternal judgment concerning our destiny? Of course, I agree. But if you’re suggesting that my article condemning immodesty is something I shouldn’t do, then tell me. Would you speak against any sin? Would you speak against murder? And if so, would your statement about judgment apply to that situation too? Fact is, Addison the Lord forbids us from engaging in a hypocritical form of judgment (Mt. 7:1), but he commands us to judge a righteous form of judgment (John 7:24).

  Fifth, you said that the church has become a place of rules and shame rather than a place of forgiveness and love and that is driving young people away. Have you ever considered that the church needs to be all the things you mentioned above? Surely you’re not suggesting that you’re against rules are you? Seems the Lord gave 10 of them to Moses and Israel. Would the young people have had valid reason to bail out at that time because of the rules? Also, you seem to think that shame is a bad think. Quite the opposite. In Jeremiah 6, the Lord reveals that one of the problems of the people at that time was that they could commit abomination and feel no shame, nor could they blush (Jeremiah 6:15). Church needs to be a place where people find forgiveness and love, but at the same time, it must be a place where people learn the rules and where their consciences are so instructed that they feel guilt when they break those rules.

  Sixth, you encouraged everyone to quit judging your generation as a whole and to invest in you. First of all, I nor anyone else that I have read after has condemned your generation as a whole. And as for investing in your generation, why do you think I offered the observations I did in my article? I could say nothing and give no spiritual guidance, or I could speak up and offer spiritual guidance. You tell me which course indicates an investment.

• I tried to write a comment that portrayed my feeling after reading this article and the comments. After writing several sentences and erasing them all I can say is I am sad and ashamed of most of these people comments being aimed at girls they’ve never met and places they’ve never been. Making comments that make them seem holier than thou. While I’m sure they mean well if I were a non-Christian or a teen girl I would immediately rebel. When you make unkind and “Me and my family are better than that” statements it has the direct opposite affect of what I’m sure you intend. I can see one comment above that everyone else has seemed to ignore

  “All that you mention isn’t the problem, it’s the symptom. The problem is with the heart and no amount of forbidding, lecturing, shaming or rule making will change the heart. If it did, we would still be under law. We need to teach our children, and perhaps learn for ourselves, what it means to truly love God. Until we do, we will not see an improvement.”-revcall

  Condemn the behavior but teach people lovingly, not by sticking your nose up in the air pretending to pray.

• Tish, thanks for taking time to write. While I agree in principle with what you said, I don’t believe your application is correct. First of all, I agree that a “holier-than-thou” attitude is sinful. But what makes one guilty of having such an attitude? Exposing error in another? Does this automatically make you have a holier-than-thou attitude?” Jesus, himself exposed the errors in the lives of others and called them to live in a better way. Surely that wasn’t an expression of a holier-than-thou attitude. What I’m saying is don’t confuse the exposing of error (which must be done) with possessing a prideful attitude.

  You closed by saying condemn the behavior, but teach people lovingly. I agree. In fact, I would ask that you point out which part of my article was “unloving.” Thanks.

• Very good article. I have a young daughter that would totally agree.

• Good article……my children are grown and married……but, sadly to say, we expect such behavior from the worldly people…….but, the church has not taught strongly about what God really loves, and what HE hates……holiness is an ugly word to many so called believers. Breaks my heart…..modesty is out the window…..nobody wants to take a real stand. Bothers me that there seems to be a lack of conscience in many areas…..thanks again

• I am so glad someone finally spoke up on this issue! I don’t watch sporting events for this very reason. I also don’t watch much TV because of the underwear commercials and all of the shows with the soft porn. We are so inundated with so much soft porn (and some not so soft) that people have just accepted it as the norm. It should not be accepted! Thank you for going out on a limb to speak your mind on this subject. There are more of us out there than most people think. We feel like we are alone in our beliefs until someone like you speaks up. THANK YOU!

  As for Addison, I have seen some dance team uniforms that are modest. I am always happy to see a cheer uniform or dance uniform that provides coverage. It’s rare, but I have seen them. And I don’t think we are judging their whole generation, because it’s more than just the current college students dressing like this. The pro teams also have cheerleaders who barely have clothes on. I remember in the early 80s watching sports with my then husband and being embarrassed by the cheerleader uniforms.

• We must have been at the same football game. Sad to think they look so good out in public in their under ware! Parent need to be parents, step up and do the job God called you to do. Pray, lead, and teach them what is pleasing in God’s sight.

• For the teens reading the article, I want you to know that as adults we are not condemning you or your generation personally. Millennials ( born from 1995ish on) and young Gen Y ( 1970s -1994ish) greatest desire is for lasting, loving, marriages. (We realize that our generation as a whole has not demonstrated how to do that very well. But we are wising up to it now.) The reason this issue of dress and dance is disturbing to us is because it will hurt your relationships. Sadly, you have been taught the wrong messages about how to present yourselves, how male verses female respond to stimulation etc.

  Teenage girls, honestly, don’t know how men are wired. Girls see something and we think it is pretty. Men see the same thing and are aroused. When men are constantly aroused they could act on that arousal believing that is what the girls wants. Relationships become about personal gratification, rather than about being known and loved. For us women, this is devastating. We are not objects. That is the point of the article. We trust that is not the girl’s intent to send that message by their short shorts, hand prints and movements, but it is the message being sent and someone has to tell them.

  I read lots of articles where feminists are horrified that there is a double standard for women’s dress. I understand it feels unfair, but the fact is men and women respond differently and it is better for a woman to know that and dress and act accordingly for her own protection, then just believe it is a double standard.

• As someone whose ex-husband is addicted to porn to the point that it destroyed our marriage, I agree! He made the statement once that he can be turned on by what the girls wear to McDonalds.
  Thank you for standing and speaking out against this. I wish it was a topic that more would talk about. I have felt very alone in dealing with this issue.

• […] See on preachinghelp.org […]

• I TOTALLY DISAGREE with this article. This is like going to an Atheists Convention and complaining that the people there do not believe in God. This article is chasing rabbits. What else does one expect from a worldly venture? There are a million and ten different activities that one can engage in and find unsavory, immodest, ungodly dress and behavior. If one complains about cheerleaders at a football game, then one would have to complain about any waitress at a restaurant with a short skirt; an immodestly dressed person at a supermarket, a gas station, anywhere and everywhere. I hear people complain about what “Hollywood” produces. What does one expect from a worldly business whose primary goal is to make money? I hear Christians complaining about all sorts of worldly affairs: the “language” in movies; women who dress immodestly (in public). Solution: stay home and watch Disney films. Some even complain about Disney films. The point is, by living IN this world, one will ALWAYS, ALWAYS encounter ungodliness, immodesty. Our purpose is to not be OF this world. Complaining about worldliness in the world is a waste of time, pointless — and it detracts from teaching Christians what WE are supposed to be doing — as opposed to complaining about what the world does; that’s what they do.

• Anthony, I appreciate you taking the time to reply, but I must also say that I disagree with the thrust of your comment. Let me explain why and ask you to reconsider the basis of your objection. You stated that you disagreed with my article based on the fact that we shouldn’t expect more from the world because, after all, they’re the world and they’re always going to act like the world, so we’re wasting our breath. (This is a summary, not a quote, but it accurately represents your reasoning, if not, you can correct me). If your reasoning is valid, then should we oppose the inspired apostle Paul’s message to the gentiles in Romans 1? Should Paul have not wasted his breath on the world? You said that “complaining about worldliness in the world is a waste of time, pointless — and it detracts from teaching Christians what WE are supposed to be doing…” So did Paul, by inspiration, waste his time by “complaining about worldliness in the world?” Did Paul’s condemnation of the way the world lives in Romans 1 “detract from teaching Christians what we are supposed to be doing?”

  You see Anthony, your line of reasoning isn’t valid. If it were, it would condemn an inspired apostle. Give it some more thought.

• I have given it thought, a LOT of thought. Paul, an inspired Apostle, was giving instructions to ALL OF US. He was delivering to us, that which he received through the Holy Spirit, which is all-inclusive — of worldly people and members of the Body of Christ. However, we could spend our time opposing, point-by-point, 1,000, 1,000,000, indeed 10,000,000 various acts of worldliness in various arenas of the world. Sir, if you see that as your calling, please pursue that direction. Of course we are to opposed worldliness; my point is, piece-meal condemnation of worldliness entangles one in that arena to the point that one cannot do anything else except “chase the rabbits” of worldliness. While preaching, teaching against worldliness, one should could go so deep into that realm that one could become in that arena instead of focusing on what really plagues the church. Your article against Racism in the church is brilliant! I sent that article out, along with this one, and to a person, every single minister commented that racism plagues the church MUCH MORE than cheerleader uniforms; for if one refrains from going to the games where these cheerleaders are, one will not encounter the “soft porn” to which you referred. I read blog after blog of ministers speaking out against “Dancing With the Stars” and the attire on that show and MANY, MANY other reality shows, cable shows’ original programming, movies, etc., denouncing the language, the attire and other shows of worldliness that are usually inherent in those types of shows. Soap operas have been around for decades, along with their story lines of adultery, fornication, etc. As I stated, the goings-on at a football game are things that happen at a football game: there are those who curse, drink (and get drunk); are there to “scout out” girls for ungodly activities after the game; some who engage in works of the flesh at games and a myriad of other worldly activities. It is cherry-picking to condemn cheerleaders’ uniforms when a whole host of other worldly, fleshly activities are taking place, simultaneously. My mistake is: this is your blog, sir, and you have the right to express your points of view on it. Therefore, I am wrong to come onto your blog site and oppose you; please forgive me. I’ll leave you with this, sir: I sent this article to MANY ministers, preachers, teachers, members of the church — and believe it or not, they, too, see this article as a waste of time. To be fair to you sir, someone made copies and there is a stack of this article in the atrium of our building; so, there are many who agree with you. I truly believe that more, many more, agree with you than who agree with me. So, carry on, sir.

• Proverbs 10:19 was surely written for moments such as these, “In the multitude of words sin is not lacking, But he who restrains his lips is wise.” Were I you Anthony, I would have said I’m sorry and left it at that, but you didn’t. Instead you buried your feeble apology in a pile of worldly rhetoric.

• I’M SORRY.