PreachingHelp.org While I do not consider myself to be an expert in evaluating the friendliness of a congregation, I do regularly try to see the things we do through the eyes of our visitors. I believe we all want to be a part of a “friendly” church, and we all realize how important our first impression is to visitors. Therefore, I offer the following suggestions that I believe will help us be a more friendly and welcoming church.
- Don’t Draw Attention to Your Visitors. What I mean by that is don’t single them out in a way that they become conspicuous. While I am sure the person who thought of sticking those little roses on our visitors meant well, this “mark of Cain” is the last thing most visitors would want.
- Don’t Push for a Visitor’s Address. Of course, we would love to have their address in order to reach them, but many visitors have family situations that a follow-up contact would complicate. Provide them the opportunity to leave their address if they so choose, but don’t pressure them to do so.
- Don’t Use “Inside Jargon” Visitors Won’t Understand. Do you remember what it feels like to be on the outside of an inside joke? It’s not pleasant. Neither is it pleasant for our visitors who hear us talk using our “inside church jargon.” For instance, I know that in the congregation where I preach, we have several clever acronyms for various groups (e.g., Yah, M&M’s, YA’LL, etc.). In other congregations, I’ve heard (TNT, NEST, SOS, SWAG, etc.) Imagine listening to announcements inviting participation in these groups through a visitors’ eyes. How would they possibly know if these events were for them? Inside jargon is great. Use it, but use it in settings that don’t leave outsiders feeling like outsiders.
- Have Door Greeters. Meet visitors at the door with a pleasant smile and welcome, and take don’t show them where they need to go if they need help. Telling visitors to go down a hallway, take a left, at the end of the hallway, take a right, then go through the double doors, and you’ll see a door that leads to the basement, etc.). This isn’t helpful or friendly. Have friendly greeters at the door who will take people to where they need to go.
- Have a Visitor Center. Have a place where visitors can grab, not have to ask for, information about the church, activities, classes, and biblical material. These materials need to be clearly marked so that they are free to take.
- Don’t Ever Tell Someone, “You are in My Seat.” We sometimes joke about it, but really, there’s nothing funny about it. It’s unkind and ungracious and beneath the behavior of a child of God. I’ve seen it happen, and I’ve had it happen to me, and I know of visitors who never returned after such treatment. I once witnessed a visiting family be told to move, not once, but twice, and after the second time, they walked out.
- Have Visitor Parking Near the Entrance. This is not only helpful, but it shows visitors that they are valued.
- Have Active Ushers. Visitors often arrive right at starting time so they don’t have to awkwardly mingle with people they don’t know, or they may be a little late due to being unfamiliar with the drive time. Whatever, don’t allow them to stand alone at the back of the auditorium trying to find a place to sit. Have ushers who will help them find a place by asking members to scoot down the aisle. And try not to make them walk all the way to the front. Thoughtful Christians, who don’t have any health concerns, should move closer to the front of the auditorium to allow room for visitors and those who do have health issues.
- Speak to Visitors Around You. Maybe this is the most important thing we can do. However, many may find this awkward and may say, “I don’t know what to say to them?” How about starting a conversation by simply saying, “I don’t think we’ve met before…” That will get the conversation started. I have had the experience of visiting a church without anyone speaking to me. In fact, I once visited a church a week after conducting a gospel meeting for that congregation, and only the preacher’s wife spoke to me. Visitors will gauge the friendliness of a congregation on the basis of how many people spoke to them. This is one of the largest factors as to whether a visitor will or will not return.
- Explain What You’re Doing. Many visitors are “unchurched,” and they don’t know what to expect. Tell them when to stand and when to sit without relying on Pavlov’s conditioning. Tell them what the Lord’s Supper is and who is to partake of it. Tell them that visitors are not expected to give during the collection, etc. The more you communicate, the more at ease a visitor will feel.
- Sing at Least One Familiar Song. There are certain hymns that are known by all people. Make sure you include at least one of these songs so that they can participate and experience a feeling of familiarity.
- Have a Section for Visitors on Your Facebook Page and Website. Rarely will one make a cold visit to a church without first checking out their website or Facebook page. Make sure your social media outlets include basic information telling visitors what to expect and providing them with the kind of information a visitor would want (e.g., Starting times, Bible class options, dress code, order of worship, foundational beliefs, etc.).
- Follow-Up Contact. Always contact a visitor if they provide information, either by letter, phone call, email, or personal visit. A visit without any follow-up leaves the visitors wondering if anyone cared that they were present. Contact convinces them that they are valued. I know of a congregation that made this follow-up a weekly ministry. Some ladies would bake a loaf of homemade bread or cookies, and someone to take these gifts to the homes of visitors. Think of what a positive impact this would have.
These are a few of the suggestions that I believe will make our churches more “visitor friendly.” Now it’s your turn. Share some of your ideas in the comment section.